


How To Get Over Na Jaemin

by bubbleteamin



Series: the adventures of norenmin [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: As always lol, Boys Kissing, Established Relationship, Fluff, Getting Together, Huang Ren Jun is Skeptic, Lee Jeno is Whipped, Light Angst, M/M, Multi, Na Jaemin always gets what he wants, Not really though, Polyamory, and confused, as always, someone's gotta have at least one braincell after all, they're all new to this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-27
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2020-02-07 09:32:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18617899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bubbleteamin/pseuds/bubbleteamin
Summary: Jeno figures it’s time to write a book. “Getting Over The One And Only Na Jaemin: A Step By Step Guide For The Dummy Who Fell In Love With The Charming Boy For No Fucking Reason”. A bit of a long and dramatic title, but it'll probably fit the exhausting journey perfectly. Maybe some slight details have to be changed along the way, but probably nothing drastic.





	How To Get Over Na Jaemin

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to try out writing a shorter fic since whenever I start to write, I blink once and suddenly have 30,000 words, so yeah. 
> 
> Also wanted to try out polyamory because god that one recent NCT DREAM livestream had me in fucking tears lmfao with Jeno being a clingy boy with Jaemin but then also looking at Renjun's lips like he wanted to eat them and then Jaemin sniffing Renjun's neck and looking at him with his arm around Jeno's shoulders like Listen. I had to. The three of them are a mess lol
> 
> Enjoy!

Chapter One: Erase The Image From Your Eyes

 

And Jeno wishes he could. He wishes he could just _erase the image from his eyes,_ he really does. Hell, he hasn’t been able to sleep for an entire week because the image is all he can fucking see, even with his eyes closed. And said reasons for his spontaneous insomnia are now sitting in front of him, casually eating their lunch in the cafeteria like his entire life didn’t get turned upside down because of them.

 

“Jaemin, are you free this afternoon?” Renjun asks, and Jeno’s muscles tighten.

 

Jaemin looks at Jeno, smile so killing that if Jeno wasn’t already dead inside, he would’ve surely been by now. “Can Renjun join us? He can, right?”

 

Jeno wants to say that no, he _can’t,_ because he’s sure his entire life will go to shit if he’s alone with just the two of them after knowing what they did, or were doing, or _are_ doing and oh God, Jeno doesn’t want to think about it.

 

“Sure,” he answers instead, because the coward in him can’t ever say no to Jaemin. Even if the younger asked him to summon Satan just so he could check out if Hell seemed like a fun place to visit sometime, Jeno would do it without hesitating.

 

“Great.” Jaemin turns to Renjun, eyes bright. “Jeno’s parents are out, so we were planning on just drinking and watching a movie, so make sure you bring stuff for a sleepover.”

 

“Sounds cool,” Renjun says, nodding his head. Jaemin shoots him a smile that Jeno doesn’t want to read into too deeply.

 

He can’t exactly place his own feelings at this point. On one hand he’s upset that Jaemin and Renjun didn’t tell him, but on the other hand he’s jealous of Renjun and how Jaemin chose _him._ Then again, there seems to be a third hand coming out of God knows where, and that hand is reminding him how absolutely turned on he had gotten from the scene he had witnessed. Actually, that third hand is probably his dick.

 

He knows he can’t deny the way his heart seems to speed up every time Jaemin shoots that beaming smile at him, how whenever that stupid boy presses a kiss against his cheek or brushes his hand over his bicep his stomach fills with something that before he deemed only possible in books. Jeno forces himself to repress it, especially after what he has seen, because Jaemin obviously has his heart secured in someone else’s hands, and Jeno can only watch from a distance, his own love muscle contracting painfully.

 

His mind feels like it’s unsorted, though. Recently, Renjun had placed his hand on Jeno’s thigh, and he had felt like his entire body had been engulfed by hot coals. Then, during New Year’s Eve, Renjun had rested his head on his shoulder from behind, arms around his waist, and Jeno had sworn that the fireworks in front of them couldn’t compare to the ones in his heart.

 

He’s stupid. So stupid. He’s known about his crush on Jaemin since he was ten years old, for Christ’s sake, when the world had come to a stop when Jaemin had shown up to their trick or treat tradition dressed as fairy, eyes beautifully painted with his mother’s makeup, sparkling wings secured to his back and glitter all over his face. Jeno had been sure that if fairy tales truly did exist, Jaemin must’ve been the main character in all of them. It had also been the first time he had gotten insecure over his own costume, a cheaply made pirate costume with some fake dirt smeared on his cheeks. He had felt considerable under-dressed next to the other, to say the least.

 

So yeah, he’s one hundred percent sure he’s the most stupid, most confused teen out there, because there’s just no other explanation. He’s jealous and upset, that’s it, and whatever he’s feeling for Renjun is just a method made up by his brain to find a way out of actually disliking him for stealing Jaemin.

 

Renjun had joined their friendship at the start of high school, and now that they’re all freshmans in college, he’s become an unmissable part of what had once just been Jeno And Jaemin, The Inseparable Duo. If Renjun wasn’t there, Jeno and Jaemin would’ve probably gotten themselves killed by now, some way or another.

 

“Junnie, give me some of your grapes? _Pwetty pwease?_ I love you?”

 

“Fuck off, Nana.”

 

But the reality is that Jeno is scared, scared that the dynamic between the three of them is changing. He can’t explain it, because he’s sure his body will actively try to sneeze out his brain and all consciousness that come with it if he does. So he just sits there, quivering with the knowledge he wishes he didn’t possess as Jaemin’s hand rests on Renjun’s thigh.

 

 

 

Chapter Two: Pretend Everything Is Fine

 

“Have you guys picked out a movie yet?” Renjun is walking in the space between Jeno and Jaemin, and Jeno feels his hand brushing against his every now and then. It doesn’t tingle, it doesn’t feel like an electric shock shoots through him every time Renjun’s palm comes in contact with his calloused fingertips, it doesn’t feel like any of that at all.

 

“Well?” Renjun presses, looking directly at him.

 

Okay, so Jeno had been lying about that.

 

“Actually,” Jeno starts, looking away as he puts his hands in his pockets, “Jaemin said he wanted to wait with choosing something until he’s sure what mood he’s in.”

 

Now it’s Renjun’s _arm_ brushing against his, instead. Great.

 

“Jaemin, do you know what mood you’re in yet?” he hears Renjun ask. He looks over to the two of them, not able to help himself as he narrows his eyes. He notices Jaemin is shamelessly holding Renjun’s hand, and something inside Jeno flares up. How did Renjun end up walking in between them like this, anyways?

 

Jeno tunes out of whatever they’re saying, focusing on turning the right corner to his house. One time of taking the wrong turn is a mistake, but two times is just plain idiocy, and thankfully he manages to avoid the second one as he walks up to his doorstep, now walking in front of Jaemin and Renjun. He fishes for his keys, cringing as they scratch against his phone in the front pocket of his jeans. It takes a considerable amount of time before Jeno actually opens the door, his hands trembling the entire time. His body is screaming, telling him to be anywhere but here, but as always he doesn’t listen. He’s sure it will go away. This is all part of chapter one in his mental book called “Getting Over The One And Only Na Jaemin: A Step By Step Guide For The Dummy Who Fell In Love With The Charming Boy For No Fucking Reason”. The title is a bit long and rough, but he’s sure it will match.

 

Still, he can’t help but feel out of place when they end up watching Lady and the Tramp, Jaemin cuddled up to him like Renjun doesn’t exist.

 

Jeno doesn’t get it. He doesn’t get how Renjun doesn’t look bothered at all as he hugs a bowl of popcorn to his chest, eyes trained on the movie with genuine interest. He doesn’t get why Jaemin’s nails are gently tracing over his knee, eyes burning into the side of his face. So Jeno, quite frankly, ignores it with all his might. Why shouldn’t he? He can keep being upset that Jaemin and Renjun are holding something as big as this from him, angry that they’re pretending like nothing has changed, but the energy it’s slurping out of him isn’t worth it. He takes big sip of his coke.

 

“Jeno.”

 

Jeno stuffs some crisps in his mouth, staring straight ahead even though he isn’t watching the movie anymore.

 

“Jeno.”

 

He still doesn’t reply, and suddenly the presence next to him is gone. His mind wants to form words, and the air in his lungs is ready to stream through his vocal chords, but the clenching of his throat is preventing them from leaving his mouth. The shuffling to his right suggests that Jaemin is now leaning against Renjun, and Jeno forces his eyes to keep looking at the screen. Or rather at nothing, unfocused as he tries to will his body to relax.

 

“Renjun.”

 

“I’m trying to watch the movie, go away.”

 

“No, I’m bored.”

 

“You picked the damn movie, Jaemin.”

 

Jeno doesn’t have to look over to see the pout on the younger’s face, his mind painting a perfect picture for him.

 

“I don’t care. I don’t want to watch it anymore.”

 

“But I do. Go bother Jeno.”

 

“But he’s ignoring me.”

 

Jeno’s body is tensing up, and he doesn’t know why. He finally decides to look over, and two pairs of eyes meet his. He lets out a sound of confusion, probably sounding way more choked up than he intended. He can’t even fool himself anymore.

 

“Jeno,” Renjun says, “You don’t even like Disney movies. Go entertain him.” His finger points at the boy glued to his body, who smiles innocently. “He’s being annoying. Go play Mario Kart in the other room or whatever.”

 

Jeno suddenly feels angry, blood starting to boil as his throat unclenches enough to snap out words. “Why should I? He’s not my fucking boyfriend.”

 

Rationality is a concept for people who regret their life choices on their deathbeds, anyways.

 

Although he must admit that the silence that follows is a bit painful.

 

“...What?” It’s Renjun’s voice.

 

Jeno figures that you can certainly regret things in the present, as well.

 

Jeno looks away. The air is swelling up around them, and he’s sure he’s gonna suffocate if he doesn’t say something. “You heard me. Maybe I want to watch the movie, too.”

 

It’s no excuse, not after the weight of his previous words. In any other situation, it could’ve been played off as a joke, but not right now, not when there was an intention behind the words that everyone in the room picked up on. But Jeno isn’t gonna apologise, not for his emotions.

 

“Jeno…”

 

“No, Jaemin.” Jeno stands up. “Go make out with him or something. I’m going to sleep.”

 

But he doesn’t get far, Renjun’s hand grabbing hold of his arm, tight enough to leave a bruise. “Jeno, don’t be a fucking toddler.”

 

He spins back around to face the two of them, who are way too close together for his liking. “Don’t you fucking dare call me a toddler when you two didn’t even fucking bother to tell me you’re dating!”

 

Jaemin’s face looks pale, eyes wide and mouth agape, while Renjun looks oddly relaxed, only making Jeno feel more like his blood is about to cook his flesh.

 

“Jen, we were gonna tell you, but…” Jaemin starts, but Jeno’s mind becomes foggy after hearing him say the word “we” _._ Where is Jeno’s part in the “we” _._ Since when is “we” Jaemin and Renjun, not Jaemin and Jeno. He doesn’t get it. He doesn’t fucking get it.

 

“Jeno, are you even listening?” He doesn’t know if it’s Renjun or Jaemin who’s speaking, but then again it doesn't matter, does it? They’re a “we”, now.

 

“Jeno, why are you overreacting like this? Don’t be a baby, fucking hell. We’re trying to explain it to you.”

 

“I don’t want to hear it,” Jeno says, voice sharp enough to cut through thick layers of skin. Probably his own skin, though; he feels like he’s gonna bleed out.

 

His eyes manage to focus on the scene in front of him again, and Renjun’s mouth opens. “I think you really want to, though, so just fucking listen.” Renjun stands up, leaving Jaemin’s arms as empty as Jeno feels. “I don’t know how you found out, and we’ll talk about that later, but for now, since you clearly can’t focus for more than three fucking seconds, I’ll get to the main thing.” He takes a step closer to Jeno. “Yes, Jaemin and I are dating, and we didn’t tell you because we didn’t know how to bring up the fact that we aren’t completely content yet.”

 

Jeno frowns. “The fuck am I supposed to do with that? Want to spice things up in the fucking bedroom? Fuck off.”

 

“Jeno, I like you.” Jaemin pushes himself up from the couch to move to his boyfriend’s side. He looks like his eyes are about to fill with tears, although Jeno can’t read the source, his own body suddenly feeling freezing. He has enough brain power left to hear Jaemin’s next words, though. “And I also like Renjun.” And they sound fucking ridiculous.

 

“What the actual fuck.”

 

“Jaemin, I told you he wouldn’t understand,” Renjun says with a sigh.

 

“No, you don’t know him like I do. He likes me, and I know he likes you, too,” Jaemin says, eyes filled with determination as he takes a step forward, coming face to face with Jeno. “Jeno, I like you - no, we _both_ like you, and Renjun was too scared of your reaction to tell you so he needed some time.” Through the tightness of his face he manages to let out a tentative smile. “But I guess his time is up.”

 

Jeno’s head is spinning. They’re joking, clearly. That, or he’s dreaming and about to rudely get woken up by his alarm clock. If it’s the last one, he hopes he can at least kiss Jaemin before he can cry himself back to sleep. Maybe Renjun, too, because in this dream he can admit that he certainly wouldn’t mind that.

 

“I don’t get it.” It sounds fucking dumb, but what the fuck is he supposed to say?

 

“I didn’t either,” Renjun starts, and Jeno picks up on a tone that he’s sure is meant as reassuring. “But then Jaemin showed me a study about polyamory and I found out that it’s completely normal and possible.”

 

Jaemin puts a hand on Jeno’s shoulder. “I know it seems weird, and that you’ve probably been feeling very confused about all of it, but that’s okay.” He lets out a chuckle. “God knows I was confused when I no longer just liked you.”

 

Jeno doesn’t know what makes Jaemin so sure that Jeno likes both him _and_ Renjun, since he isn’t even sure of it himself, yet somehow the words are comforting, relaxing. Well, if he’s dreaming, why not make the best of it?

 

“I’m… I don’t know, I don’t know anything right now…” So, turns out pretending you’re dreaming is hard as hell when you’re not stupid enough to actually believe it.

 

Jaemin smiles, wrinkles around his eyes making his face look so inviting, daring Jeno to trust him. “I know, and it’s okay. You can think about it, if you want.”

 

Does he want to?

 

“No, I’m-” he takes a deep breath, “I need to talk about it. We,” he motions between the three of them, “We need to talk about it.”

 

He’s not gonna leave this conversation until he reclaims the “we”, and it’s then that he realises that he doesn’t want the “we” to be just him and Jaemin, he wants Renjun to be part of it, as well, which is fucking terrifying. Then again, when has Jaemin ever been wrong?

 

Jaemin smiles, the look in his eyes almost answering Jeno’s silent question with a “never”. Jeno doesn’t know how Jaemin went from nearly crying just a few minutes ago to this burst of confidence, complimented by a mischievous gaze. He wishes he could just switch emotions like that, so quickly and genuinely, but instead his parents blessed him with a speed of comprehension that is considerably slower than average. All he can do is watch when Jaemin takes his hand and leads him to the couch, Renjun sitting down on the coffee table in front of them.

 

“So?” Renjun looks up at him through his lashes, eyebrow raised. “Talk, then.”

 

Jeno flinches and turns to Jaemin, pointing his thumb at the eldest as he gulps. “You sure he likes me, as well?”

 

Jaemin shoots Renjun a subtle glare before turning his entire body to face Jeno. “Yeah, he does. He’s just scared because he really likes you and doesn’t want you to reject us.”

 

Reject _us._

 

There it was again, the fact that Jaemin and Renjun are already together as a “we”. But this time, as much as he wants to, he doesn’t feel angry, knowing that they want him to be a part of it. But everything about this situation is just so surreal, and so far it hasn’t gotten any less cloudy in Jeno’s mind. Maybe if he starts talking he will actually get somewhere.

 

“Okay, then I’ll just start, I guess…” He swallows, the dryness of his throat making it feel scratchy and painful. He turns his head to look at Jaemin. “Uhm, I’ve liked you since we were ten. And that I know for sure, like, one hundred percent.”

 

When his eyes move to the eldest again he notices how tense he looks, some of the nerves shining through his seemingly emotionless facade. “So when I found you two, uh, _doing stuff_ on monday, I was really confused.” He looks down to where his hands lie in his lap, way more familiar than anything else around him right now. “I felt betrayed and jealous, obviously, because you two didn’t tell me about it and, also, I just wanted Jaemin to be _mine,_ of course.” His heartbeat is picking up space, words leaving his mouth without giving him time to go over them in his brain first, which also just makes him want to scream because is it even true what he’s saying? Well, it’s not like he can stop at this point. “But I also felt like… I don’t know…” When he finally dares to look up again, Renjun’s face hasn’t changed, although a hint of fear can be found if you look at him long enough. Jaemin, on the other hand, is staring at him with big, open eyes, encouraging him to go on. “Well, I guess the jealousy wasn’t just because I wanted Jaemin to be mine, but also because a part of me felt left out? If that even makes sense.” He shakes his head hastily. “No it doesn’t, fuck, what am I even saying?”

 

“You like Renjun, as well.” Jaemin states it like it’s a fact.

 

“I still don’t get how that could be possible, though.” Jeno sighs as he runs a hand through his hair. “And how could it be that we all just so happened to be in the same situation, then? It’s so- fuck, I don’t know. It seems too good to be true.”

 

“It does. That’s why I didn’t want to tell you.” It’s the first time Renjun’s tone doesn’t make him sound like he wants to kill Jeno, slightly softened at the edges. “It’s weird enough that both Jaemin and I like you, so I was almost certain that you couldn’t possibly like the both of us on top of that. That would be too kind of the universe.”

 

The more the thought can settle in Jeno’s head, the more okay it feels. His body warms up knowing that Renjun felt like that, too. Maybe he isn’t crazy.

 

“I never understood why Jaemin seemed to certain of himself,” Renjun continued, “But then again, he’s known you his entire life, so something in me wanted to believe him. We were gonna tell you, I swear, I just… needed to think about it first.”

 

Jeno nods slowly. “How long have you two been…?”

 

“Well, we got into a random fight around two months ago and then we were suddenly making out, so…” Jaemin’s shoulders are high, body slightly hunched over as his face scrunches up. “Around that time?”

 

 _Two months._ Well, that certainly feels like a dagger to his chest.

 

Renjun notices. “I’m sorry. But better late than never, right?”

 

Jeno stays silent.

 

“Jeno.” Jaemin scoots closer. “As weird as this probably still feels to you, do you want to be our boyfriend? Take all the time you need to-”

 

The filter in his head clearly isn’t working yet, because the speed at which he nearly shouts out a “yes” doesn’t overlap with the realisation of what he just accepted to. Well, maybe it does just a little bit, but not enough for Jeno to fully be aware of the weight of it all, the true meaning behind what he just accepted to.

 

Renjun clearly didn’t see it coming, either, if his wide eyes are anything to go by. Jaemin’s face, on the other hand, looks perfectly relaxed, like Jeno’s response isn’t shocking him in the slightest; the smile on his face looks easy, so casual.

 

“So… we’re boyfriends now? The three of us? We all agree on that?” Jaemin’s eyes are bright.

 

“Just like that?” Renjun asks, one eyebrow raised. The thickness in the air hasn’t fully dissolved yet, and Renjun obviously doesn’t miss the hint of doubt on Jeno’s face, either.

 

“Yeah, why not?” Jaemin asks, tilting his head. “Do you not want to?”

 

“I just feel like, I don’t know…” Renjun sighs. “Jeno didn’t seem too sure before, so I’m a bit…”

 

“Jeno?”

 

Jeno looks up at Jaemin. “I-” His throat doesn’t let out any more than that.

 

Thankfully, Jaemin doesn’t seem to need anything else. “You’re still confused, and you too, Renjun.” He shoots Renjun a small smile before turning back to Jeno. “But I’m sure there’s no better way to figure all of this out than to jump into it face first. I trust the two of you with all of my heart, and I’m sure everything will be fine once we get used to this whole thing. Let’s do it together, okay?”

 

Jeno still can’t say no to Jaemin, even if he tried.

 

“Okay, I trust you.”

 

Renjun stares at Jeno for a few seconds before turning back to Jaemin. “Me too.”

 

Jaemin’s smile couldn’t be bigger. “Great!” He pauses, face turning sheepish as he rubs his neck. “I don’t know what to do now, though…”

 

If it does end up being a dream, Jeno isn’t gonna let this opportunity go. He steps closer. “Can you kiss me?”

 

Jaemin shoulders relax at that, his face softening as he puts a hand on Jeno’s cheek and brings it closer. “Of course.”

 

And kiss he does. God, it can’t be a dream, no way; he feels every millimeter of Jaemin’s lips on his, every rough edge. It’s too realistic to be product of his unconscious imagination. Jaemin’s hand is resting on his shoulder, and Jeno puts his own hand on the younger’s waist, their lips slotting together over and over until he eventually pulls away. When Jeno turns his head to look at Renjun, hoping he didn’t just offend the older by kissing his boyfriend, he’s met with hooded eyes. There’s a shimmer in them as he looks directly at Jeno, mouth agape in wonder.

 

“Please kiss me, too?” Renjun asks, seemingly dazed from what he just witnessed, and Jeno can’t believe all of that love is meant for him right now, when earlier that week he had seen that same look directed at Jaemin.

 

Jeno doesn’t hesitate when he steps forward, putting his hand on Renjun’s jaw as he carefully connects their lips. They’re different, of course, softer and gentler. Jeno can’t say he likes one better than the other, though, and he supposed that he really does feel something for the both of them. He doesn’t care that his head can’t completely wrap around that fact, yet; he doesn’t need his own mental reassurance to know that this feels right, and nothing more than right.

 

Chapter Three: Accept That Renjun And Jaemin Are Together

 

Maybe he needs to change the title of his book after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it! I think I like writing longer fanfics more, though. We'll see
> 
> Comments and constructive criticism are always welcome in this household, and so are kudos :) so please do tell me what you thought of it and what I can improve! bc short fics are really not my specialty lol


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